Dear sixteen year old self.
Hold your head high, your too hard on yourself, walking around with zero confidence and looking at the ground. Your so young yet you have so much stress on your shoulders and the mind of someone so much older. I know its never been easy, you didnt really have much time to act young and enjoy carefree years, but you need to try. I wish you could see yourself how you truly are. You dont need to lose weight, if only you knew this instead of embarking on self destruction mode. Starvation, purging, neither of these are good. You will look back and see how slim you was, if I could go back then I would remove the negative thoughts, the self hatred and appreciate what was really there.
It makes me sad, remembering the hurt and sadness that came with an eating disorder, one that stayed for years and years to come.
There were many battles though, some more trivial than others. Enjoy school, think less of what others think. One day very soon School will be a distant memory, ignore what the 'popular' kids think, it wont matter in years to come. You felt like you didnt have the confidence to get where you wanted because you were not one of the cool kids, but you will get to a place in life where those around you don't make you feel small or not good enough.
Not only will you go on to get a degree but University will bring you best friends for life and experiences that will never leave you. Travel will follow and you will one day be in Asia working in an orphanage in Thailand, it will then hit you, that you are braver and stronger than you could have ever imagined and this is why at sixteen I wish you could have seen how unbreakable you can be.
One thing I want you to know is never lose hope and never stop being the giving and loving person you are, you may be naive. In your years to follow you are going to lose best friends, boyfriend's and your way, but no matter how many people hurt or wrong you, your goodness is what will serve you. Dont lose yourself, there will be dark times ahead, but you will make it through all of it.
Your heart will get broken twice, you will heal it again. you will hate school, but absolutely love Sixth form and University. Your best friend now won't be for that much longer, in two years you will have to find a new best friend, but you will end up with four best friends instead. You have the biggest journey ahead of you.
So hold your head high, you have every reason to.
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