Why I won't be making resolutions this year

2015 is here. I'm halfway to 50. I've had 24 New Years in my life and if I have learnt anything it's that I have rarely kept any of the resolutions I have made. Resolutions used to be silly things - I'll stop biting my nails, I'll give up chocolate.

Then getting older the resolutions just became more harsh, I'll change how I look or I'll change myself. Back then I wish someone was there to shout noooo!

This year I'm making no resolutions not one. The last few years have been hard and taught me so much about life and myself and who I am and who I'll always be. We don't just change and why should we. Why should we tell ourselves that we are not okay and that we need to make resolutions to alter our life and what we do and what we are. If your unhappy of course there are ways of changing that, and that's great that's what we should be doing - looking at what is making us unhappy or what is holding us back from our hopes our dreams and our happiness. So cut crap out your life, get rid of the negative, walk away from your failures and from people who don't appreciate you and that don't make your everyday better simply because they are in it. Life is short, it's fleeting, 2016 will be here soon enough and there is nothing worse then thinking oh shame on me as I didn't follow those resolutions through. 

No! Instead by next year - you should be saying - I'm glad I embraced me. I'm glad I bettered myself - make decisions for your happiness, hold close your loved ones, leave the bad ones, work in a job that makes you happy that you wake up everyday thinking yeah I'm alright with going in today. Study. Learn. Take opportunities and learn to accept yourself flaws and all and spend time on those that know all your flaws and still love you regardless. 

Take risks! Say yes more. Say no more and don't question something or adapt to what others think is right. Follow your heart. Treasure your mind. And make memories. 

So scrap that resolution list. Take each day as it comes and do what you have to do. But if you do one thing - be kind, to yourself, to those around you and to your life.

Happy new year! 365 days. Live them. 

Jade xox

Save a life this Christmas - Give Blood

Ive decided to write about something really important to me. Something that I wish I had started doing earlier in life. Donating Blood. I started giving blood at about 20. I would have given before but since I was 16 I had really bad anaemia and was pretty poorly myself for a long time. At 20, I had started to make my anaemia better by having lots of iron, and I was finally able to become a blood donor.

My Grandad was a blood donor, up until the time come when he needed a blood transfusion to save his own life. My Nan and Dad have both also had blood transfusions that have saved their life, and without these blood donations they wouldn't be here today, and ultimately neither would I.

The first time I gave blood they told me It was going to be hard, I have really deep veins and so finding a vein is hard and not only that but getting it in the vein was going to be hard and painful. Well it was, I think 3 of the lovely blood nurses tried, eventually they got it in there.. But i did faint. Trust me to cause so much drama, but I would do it all over again. There is no better feeling than knowing you have done something that will save another person.

 

I remember being so anxious to get back and thinking that I wish there wasn't a wait. I got my donor card, and I kept booking in. I had to take a break for a while as I travelled to Asia and got a tattoo, but as soon as i could I was back. The amazing thing is that the Blood team are so lovely, welcoming and caring and they make it all a wonderful experience.

 


Last week I gave my 5th blood donation, and my blue donor card is most likely on its way. Giving for the 5th time was the easiest yet, and took about 5 minutes, even the blood nurses said 'its because your a pro now' I know for a fact I will continue to donate every three months for as long as I can and I have already booked my next appointment in February. Its so easy, and rewarding, and your saving people. There really is no better gift that you can give than life itself.

So I urge every single one of you that can - To donate this Christmas, to become a donor, to save a life and to give the greatest gift of all.
It truly is one of the greatest things I've done and something I feel so passionately about.
So please please... Register now or find your nearest blood donation place
and let me know your experiences :-)

Click here to save a life this Christmas

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Jade xox

We all have that one.

We all have that one person, that changes everything. That comes along into your life, bringing so many hopes, promises and expectations, and then shatters them all. Leaving you worse off than before, leaving you a mess and making you question if there is ever going to be a point in putting yourself out there again.

You tell yourself your not going to fall this time, and you try so hard to keep your guard up and tell yourself 'There is no point in giving in to this person' deep down you know that it's just going to lead to hurt. You were right, it led to hurt, and ended anyway.

Then you think to yourself... the cycle will just start again, now i'll go back to putting my guard up and not falling for someone again, but you do and so on...The never ending cycle of hurt and love.

But there will always be that one person. The one person who you start the cycle for again, it ends, your hurt, but maybe just maybe you won't allow it do just what its done before.

After a while, and after disappointment and heartbreak, we get strong, we adjust, and we become more resilient, now maybe its not that it hurts less, i believe all hurt is hurt and there isn't a light hurt, its probably more the fact that we know that we can get through it, because we have before.

If you have read my blog before, you would know that I have had my heart broke, like we all have, you would know that I struggled, and I did feel like what's the point. It's only human to feel like we don't want to be let down again, or that with this string of fails that we should just give up, because we are so used to this pattern of meeting men that are quite simply not a great representation of a man.

It really was no different for me this time round. I hold back, because I'm wise to hurt, and believe me It's not like after being disappointed by this person that I just jumped up and thought 'Im fine onto the next one' I had the same doubts I had previously, that maybe simply I am unlovable, or not capable of meeting a genuinely good guy, and falling in love and being happy like every single one of my best friends is. Which is another hard thing. I have the most amazing, supportive, loving best friends, but every single one is in a happy stable and long relationship, which has left me as the single one for so long, it can be hard. But yeah, I still had them doubts this time, still felt gutted, insecure, messed about, it will never be easy to lose something or someone, thats not how we work. You lose a friend at the same time, you lose a part of you. I guess more than anything I just cannot afford to let myself sink, I can't cry for days, I can't be negative. I've come too far in whats happened to me and my life, to let myself assign myself to a life of failure and loss. So yeah, that one person has the power to hurt you, and you cannot run away from that .. But what you can do is let that one person show you that your strong, that as much as they have damaged a part of your soul, your still here, and your still going.

I have taken a lesson from anyone who has ever hurt me. Its easy to let someone wreck a part of you, when you give someone love, you give them that option. But, ultimately, the fact that you have given someone that much responsibility over your heart, is a big thing, and for you to come back after, well you have that responsibility back yourself now, so once you have been hurt, take all your control back, show that person that you are resilient, and above all don't let it break you or who you are, or what you hope for in life, because with that, its only you that can break them things.

Jade xox

Things you learn at 24.

I turned 24 in October, it was hardly a landmark occasion. I worked. Opened my Birthday cards alone and celebrated with those I love on a completely different day. And there I was 24. A year away from 25, which may I add is half way to 50, and well suddenly I felt 24, old and wishing I was sixteen again.

Still feeling bleak about this grand old age, I've decided to compose a list of things you learn about life, love and everything in between, at this standstill age of 24.

Love and Fairy-tales don't always begin at 16.

I remember growing up thinking that you have to meet the love of your life before you turn 20, so when I turned twenty, I got a little disheartened, thoughts that crossed my mind were 'I will never have a diamond wedding anniversary' 'I'll be old when I have kids' - All silly trivial things, and things that I had grew up believing were vital, Disney had basically shown me this, and fictional books, and all other crap that forms our beliefs. Well my grandparents are still together and they are my idols when it comes to what a relationship, and a real life fairy-tale is, and now I realize they actually married in their late twenties and started having children then, and they still had their golden anniversary! - So its possible, but I've learnt that our own fairy-tales can start at any age.

Greyhairs and Wrinkles are wonderful things to come.

So yeah, typical for my luck, I found my first grey hair. This was a devastating and shocking moment, I won't lie. I looked at it and thought 'Who the hell are you, who invited you!' I was simply mortified, and i pulled it out and looked at the bitch for a while, and realized we may not feel old, but our body ages whether we like it or not. So here's to more grey hairs that i'll obviously dye over, and wrinkles will probably soon start to surface, so I'm gonna stock up on that Olay shit.

Things can only get better?

So they say that our greater years are yet to come. But after our greater years come the downhill slopes, with a bit of shrinking in height involved. So I guess enjoy yourself up until your fifties, and then buy some new, smaller, and appropriate shoes to walk the rest of the years in ;)

You realize who your true friends are.

When I was at school, I had a group of best friends, I thought that they would be my best friends for the rest of my life. I knew nothing else. I loved my pals so much that they featured on my Picso website, I even added them in my favorites on Bebo. Sad fact of life is now that you probably aren't friends with the people you were friends with at school, or at the lovely age of 14/15. My best friends now consist of people I have met through my later life, and there really is no need to put a page dedicated about them on the internet, because they know who they are, they know that we really will be friends till we are old now, and that's all that really matters at this age, that you have secure friendships with people you could go weeks without seeing or speaking too, but that when you do nothing changes.

Body image becomes sacrilege.

Damn, I used to worry so much about my body and how I looked at 16, when I was young, slim and naturally fresh looking. Now at 24, Its even more important as it becomes even harder to lose weight, to tone, to keep your hair good and your skin youthful, and well then there is the fear of everything going downhill literally.

You still might not know what you want to be.

Youth brings dreams, and hopes and your sure that you will just grow up and become that thing you have always wanted to be. But it doesn't work that way, and at 24. I simply have no real idea of who or what I want to be, or when any of this is happening. This comes after three years working to a Media Degree and countless jobs and travels. And I used to be so sure of things I wanted.


Things you love become things you now hate.

Used to totally love getting smashed out my face.
Oceana used to be so cool, loved a student night there.
Mmmm Lambrini and cheap drink.
You get the point.

and things you hated become things you now love.

Who wants to stay in on a Friday night anyway?
Why would people bother to run?
Why bother with expensive alcohol?
Again... point proven.

Family becomes more important

As you get older, so does your soul, but so does everyone around you, suddenly our grandparents really are grand and well older, and well everyone is not the same, no children family parties anymore. Mum and Dad suddenly become treasured companions to you, and you begin to hold even tighter on to those you love.. they become more precious, and more fragile.

Death becomes reality.

I went to my first funeral at 24. It was scary. I realized that people are only going to get older, get ill, and that people die. It's a fact I always hid away from. But it's a thing of life, its reality, and nobody lives forever. As you get older, everyone else does, and it's a sad part of our lives, but at 24, Its made me realize to appreciate and live mine more than I did at 16.

Anxiety creeps in.

We only gain more worries. There becomes more things to think and worry about. Housing, rent, bills, mortgages, insurances... Oh to have the worries of a 16 year old wondering when EMA was getting paid in that week, because you so needed that new top or that funky new phone case.


Friday nights become the old Sunday Nights

Give me Netflix, a duvet, chocolate and a bit of cider and that is all. Goodbye hangovers, loud and dodgy nightclubs full of minors and no sleep.

You can't handle drink like you used to think you could.

Oh we are off out, first time in a while... Oooo Jager's yeah i'm in....
OH MY GOD... NOT THIS HANGOVER AGAIN. It was oh so easy drinking at 18.

Children are now brighter than you.

Looking after children I now see how much my brain cells have already gone on a trip somewhere else, I have forgotten how to work out percentages, sometimes I forget how to spell. Now this is either a thing that happens after 8 years out of school.. or I really am just on an adventure to dementia early.

You feel old when talking to younger people about the 90's

Spicegirls. Rugrats. Wild Thornberries. SpaceJam. Jellies. Gogos. Sabrina. Keenan and Kel. These little minors no nothing..... and likewise I couldn't give two shits about Peppa Pig or One Direction.
Jeeze, now we know how Mum and Dad felt...

You infact reminisce on the 90's..

Oh how I miss Top Of The Pops, and an hour or so with Noel in his Party House, Safe to say that Art Attack inspired me as a child...Crystal Maze and Animals of Farthing Wood, are personal favorites. And Ant and Dec belonged on SMTV.

So what have you learnt along the way?

Jade xox