Rome wasn't built in a day.

God built the world in seven days, But Rome wasn't built in a day. 
When it comes to life, we are all at different stages, some of us are struggling to get by, and some of us are soaring through reaching the stars. In life it's so important to remember that we get to where we are going all in our own time, and when our journey gets us there. Along the journey some of us will hit crossroads, and road blocks that will hold us up on our way. Its hard though, sometimes we will think 'Why do bad things happen to good people? - Why do they get all they want without trying? - Why am I still stuck going nowhere?' It can be so frustrating when we are stuck at our own crossroads, and everyone else seems to just cruise along on a one way route.

Many times I have reached a point in my life where I have had to make crucial decisions. When I Graduated University with a Honors degree in Media, I was lucky to get a job straight away with a Media company. Some will say this was lucky, but to this day I never put it down to being lucky, I searched way before I graduated and emailed and phoned many people looking for media work in preparation. I put effort into finding the job, it didn't just turn up one morning by luck, it took effort and determination, and yes it was lucky, but also down to my own self. Now working in The Media, was good, and I got a-lot of experience and stuff for my portfolio, I loved all the creative stuff I could do, and the opportunitys I got were amazing. However last year when I had a-lot going on, and was quite frankly having the worst year of my life. I quit. I walked away, packed up my box of office stuff like in the movies, and I left. I had no job to go to, but I also knew I was done there. Most would call this foolish, brave, stupid, crazy. But for me - I wasn't going down the path I wanted to be walking to get to where I one day want to be. It wasn't making me happy, I lost my drive. However again after Hunting like crazy I started a new job within a week, and was on a new path, or you could say, back on my old path the one I needed to get back on to.

Life takes effort. Most or all of us will have a dream, will have goals, or will have a vision of ourselves and our future, we all have an idea of what we want and where we want to be one day. Its important to NEVER lose sight of this, It's what drives us in life. Sometimes we do have to take risks. Leaving my job in the Media was a risk, and it may not have worked out, it still might not - But we have to do what we have to do sometimes, and follow our hearts and dreams. I am one of these people anyway who values happiness over money, and would choose a job for job satisfaction and rewards rather than pay cheques. But that's just me.

So - I urge you all to write a list of goals. It doesn't have to be a full on Bucket List like I produced for one of the pages on this blog, and nor does it have to be like a set of New Years Resolution, It can be as little as 3 Goals for Life, Goals that you never want to lose sight off, Goals that drive you. Keep these goals somewhere that you can look at often.  It doesn't matter when you complete the goals, that's what is so important about them. You could achieve them in 20 years to come. But they are your goals, and they are you, they don't belong to anyone else's, It's your journey and you take as-long as you need. The journey is the destination.

My Goals for Life

- Become a Paramedic
- Travel the world
- Own a House
- Marriage then children

The important thing is not to be bitter over life's disappointments. Learn to let go of the past. And recognize that every day won't be sunny, and when you find yourself lost in the darkness and despair, remember it's only in the black of night you see the stars. And those stars will lead you back home. So don't be afraid to make mistakes, to stumble and fall, cause most of the time, the greatest rewards come from doing the things that scare you the most. Maybe you'll get everything you wish for. Maybe you'll get more than you ever could have imagined. Who knows where life will take you. The road is long and in the end, the journey is the destination. 

Jade xox

What it feels like to have your heart broken.

"My Dearest Allie. I couldn't sleep last night because I know that it's over between us. I'm not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that's what you've given me. That's what I hope to give to you forever. I love you. I'll be seeing you. Noah " - The Notebook

Everyone will experience heartbreak at some point in our life, and we can get a broken heart from many different reasons, but I am focusing on getting your heartbroken by another person, from a relationship or just from unrequited love itself.

The movies would have us believe that our true love will come back to us and that all our heartache will be rewarded when they realize that they want to be with us, there will be a happy ending. However I'm sorry to say that the movies were wrong. Sometimes the only happy ending we get is the one we make ourselves, the one we get at the end of our own journeys where we start to write our own story, this is the only happy ending that we will get from getting our hearts broken.

So what does it feel like to have our heart broken?

I remember when I truly had my heartbroken. Before it happened, I believed I knew what heartbreak felt like, I thought I had experienced it a few times, from silly past relationships, I guess I had an idea of what it was like, but the times before had merely been a slight pinprick to the heart, and because of this I had never prepared myself for the immensity of Heartbreak. Trust me you will know if you have been there, its tough, really tough, but I feel like it's really important for me to discuss this subject because when it happens, you honestly feel like you will never get out of it, and that it will never get better, and when people used to tell me that it would, I never believed them, so I am writing this for those who are where I was a 11 months ago, and to show them that I know exactly what it's like and to make them see that they will get past it.

So a few months after I broke up with my ex I came across the 5 Stages of Heartbreak, which you can find anywhere on the internet and in self help books. It pretty much sums up stages that we go through, and it really is accurate in explaining our feelings, however I found that these stages can change order, and we can even repeat this stages. 
Here i have written my own version of the stages due to my own experience.

Denial

Our sadness and grief is too overwhelming, we cannot cope without that person, we are in shock, so it's easier to pretend it's not happening, surely if we pretend it's not happening then when we wake up tomorrow everything will be back to normal right? 

I look back at my own denial and it makes me sad, it's such a hard part of it all, because we are just so desperate and sad that we can't even face it, deep down we know we are going to have to but we just want to delay it a little while longer. 

Anger

How could they do this? We were in love, they said forever, I will never forgive them for this. I will never forgive myself. I will never trust anyone. The world is such a mess. I hate love, love is pointless.

Anger is normal, and anger is good, embrace it, and get out your emotion, at least you are now feeling an emotion and facing it, just don't do any revenge attacks, you will think about it though during this stage, you will think about getting revenge, but it's not worth it, instead release it through running or kickboxing, because we don't want them getting the satisfaction of our feelings. Anger is after-all just a shallow blanket to the pain we are feeling inside.

Bargaining

I was angry I didnt mean what I said, I dont really hate you, I love you, Please lets start again, we can fix this. I know what I will do, Ill message them, I'll show them I love them, They will change their mind, they will see this is a mistake. Its all my fault, I can fix this.

Like denial this is another sad point, we start to bargain with ourselves and with them. We send messages, and hold hope that they will change their mind. Chances our 90% of the time they wont, and for the 10% that change their mind, it probably wont work and will rarely be the same. The bargaining comes out of the loneliness we are feeling, the sadness and loss.

Depression

Life's over with. No point without them. I'm going to stay under my covers all day and sleep. I don't want to see anyone. I don't want to listen to music, in-fact just turn the music off, I am sick of hearing love songs and songs about a broken heart. Just go away.

Our grief hits an all time low. Remember heartbreak is grieving, it is loss, just like if someone dies, its a loss. We reach a black pit of despair, we may stop eating, we lose joy in things, we don't want to know. This is a hard stage and can end up overwhelming us. Surround yourself with family and friends, and embrace the sadness, let it make you, let it change you. You have to go through this, its all in our recovery so cry all you can.

Acceptance

My friends have been amazing. Today I laughed so much, today I forgot. Its been a few days and I didn't even think about them. I have to try to move on, its done now.

We slowly begin to live again. More good days than bad. Starting to accept but not forget. You still love them but you are accepting defeat and accepting you have no power over it anymore. Well done for getting here, its not over, there is a long way to go, but you have started to mend.

Your the only one who can save yourself and you have to want to do it, you have to want to heal, when you do your heart will always mend 100 times stronger, you are more powerful than you know, you are made to be strong, one day you will look back and be proud of what you overcame.

So take one step at a time, and embrace this journey, you will find out things about yourself, and begin to love yourself and trust yourself. Its a great opportunity to better yourself and mould yourself into a strong and independent person.

You are never alone in heartbreak, which is the most comforting thing about it all, you know that someone else out there is in the exact same boat, so as lonely as you feel, know you are never alone in the lonely hearts club.

Jade xox

The modern world of DATING

“Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, Be calm-love me-today-yesterday-what tearful longings for you-you-you-my life-my all-farewell. Oh continue to love me-never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved. Ever thine. Ever mine. Ever ours.” Beethoven to his "Immortal Beloved"

Beethoven seemed like a pretty romantic guy, obit a tad dramatic and OTT, However it would be nice to see a few more Beethovens around now, ones that have no shame in telling someone exactly how they feel, and more so writing it down as a letter.

We live in a generation of social nymphos. Taking selfies, making them our display picture on Facebook. Instagramming what we ate and our latest gym kit. Tweeting about our fury that they cancelled some TV show or ranting about the latest football scores. These levels of social phenomenons have been around for a while now, and with the access to technology and the internet that wasn't there 50 years ago we have also changed the way we date and have relationships. Plenty of Fish and Tinder are just a few of many dating social apps that we can now absorb ourselves in. Life for the single twenty something is a drastic comparison to the twenty something of the 1950's. Programmes like Catfish have highlighted just how many people are embarking on online relationships, many of which are constructed by fake profile pictures and fake social accounts.

But it's not only Social sites and apps which have withered dating in 2014. So what's changed about dating in the modern world and is it for the better or the worse?

First off I am going to begin with an account of love and relationships today. Since the age of 17 I have been in and out of serious relationships, one of these was for two years and then a few months later I met my now ex boyfriend who i was with for three and a half years, this took me up to the age of 22 and to 2013 on Valentines Day, where i was to embark on being single and the joys that the single life brings. When I broke up with my ex I decided to stay single for at-least one whole year, and for some of you this will seem not long at-all and others this will seem a lifetime, but for me it had to be done. So coming up to nearly a year of being single now, it's safe to say I have experienced dating in the modern world, and was shocked at what it can really be like.

So more and more first dates are now taking place on SKYPE, people are meeting partners online, and jumping straight into relationships, because their weeks of Facebooking and Whatsapping eachother paid off, they may have added a little Facetime in too for good cause. Romance is dead, you see less and less men wondering home with flowers for their partners and courting is starting to become a thing of the past. Men and Women are showing less respect for each other and mainly less respect for themselves. People are getting married older, having children older and less time is spent on finding the one. Nobody really talks about love at first sight anymore, and the modern day love letter is usually a drunken Facebook message or text.

Two of the main things that seem to have had a major effect on dating and love in 2014 are the following:

FWB - The wonderful word we have come to know as 'Friends with Benefits' something which i strongly believed was male orientated and designed for guys who didn't want to commit or embark on charming a girl just to get them into bed. I was wrong, Girls are just as bad. We have all turned into a casual generation, where sex is sex and it doesn't matter who it's with, as-long as it's safe who cares right? I think this is one of the things that bothered me the most. I just can't believe that there are girls out there who are just as bad as guys, they will embark on a FWB but then complain that guys don't take them seriously and that they cannot find someone to be in a relationship with, well is it any wonder, if you spent more time and effort on finding someone genuine than getting your underwear off in 5 seconds flat, then maybe someone would take you seriously? Again I cannot slate anyone who does have a FWB situation, if it works for you then good, but you only need to watch the films to see that someone may want more and get hurt. 

Then there is CHEATING - It seems it's more and more likely that you will be cheated on at-least once in your life, in fact the odds of this are pretty high - Again women are culprits of this too, I am a strong believer that if you have urges to cheat or do cheat then you really should not be with who you are with, so don't be a coward and do the right thing, stay single or find someone your not going to cheat on. Cheating is disgusting behavior and should not be tolerated, go and be in the FWB category if that's what your inclined to.

So some of you really may not see an issue with any of the above, and it might just be the norm now, but it really only seems sad when you compare it to the old fashioned way of dating and love, stories that spurned great love stories and films, and an ideology that changed the life's of many.

Men were gentlemen, Women were Ladies. Men dressed to impress and Women had respect for themselves, they had class. Dating in the 50's was clear cut. There was no messing around, no games or head messing, no 3 date rules or worries over whether to reply to a text straight away. There was clarity and clear intentions. 

Then there was courting, men picked up the women took them to the cinema or to a bowling alley or for icecream, and he would woo her, bring flowers, there were no distractions from mobile phones, if you made another date you would stick to it, you couldn't text to cancel. There was excitement, each date was like an occasion, it would have effort and it would be special.

Men chasing women was not like it is today where guys pursuit girls for sex, men generally enjoyed chasing women and showering them with romantic things, and the end goal was for them to simply go steady.

In 1963 The Beatles released 'I want to hold your hand' which was a chart topper at the time, however imagine this being written now, Paul Mccartney would have probably been quite chuffed to just hold hands with a girl he was seeing but today Robin Thicke quite clearly demonstrates the changes that have happened in regards to what Men want. 

Going steady was our today's 'going out with' however quite often this would mean a guy giving the girl a token to show her he was hers, like a letterman sweater or an item of his like a ring. Then ofcourse, Marriage and Babies would come and there were less divorces, less cheating and people stuck with their relationships, if there was problems they would make it work.

Being a romantic, I still live in hope of an old fashioned love, with a gentlemen, so instead of embarking on settling for something which has no meaning, simply so i'm not single, I am instead going to wait, and respect myself enough to never settle.  There are still Gentlemen and Ladies out there, they are just rarer to find, so make your own old fashioned love story and don't succumb to some of the negatives that have developed over time.

Are you lucky enough to have this type of old fashioned love? Let me know

Jade xox

Your Questions.. Answered.

Last week I asked those of you on Facebook and Twitter to give me some of your problems and questions for me to look at and respond to. Thank you for all of you who did, and below is some of the ones I received.

Thailand sounded amazing how did you go about this?

I booked my placement through Starfish volunteers. You can find them online, flights were booked with STA and I flew with Thai Airways. Id urge everyone to give volunteering a go, especially in Thailand doing something worthwhile, its rewarding and life changing and you will make a difference and reap the rewards of seeing it happen.

Whats your views on forgiveness?

Forgive but never forget.  Ah, this has always been my flaw and the hardest thing for me,  to forgive,  seems so simple, but isnt. I know that in life we have to forgive,  holding onto things only makes us bitter. It solves nothing.  So yes, forgive if you can,  try to atleast. But you wont necessarily forget, we don't forget as we protect ourselves from it happening again. Most importantly is forgiving ourselves,  we have to do this first and its always harder.

Should I stay with someone whos cheated on me?

Im not going to lie and tell you how you should always walk away and other power stuff. I was cheated on many times by my ex, I always stayed,  probably because I was scared of being alone and I loved them, but at the end of the day, every time he cheated damage was done and fragments of our love washed away, it was never the same. We got by, but the real issue was us, not the cheating.  It comes down to why. I believe sometimes it can be solved and it can even fix a relationship.  So really you have to establish why its happened and see for yourselves if its worth saving.

What do you value most in life?

Above all else my family. My best friends are family also. Always hold your loved ones close, to me thats my world in one.

Shouldn't single parents be supported more by the government? I love my job but I'm no better off I feel theirs alot of single parents out there who work to get by without insensitive. Whats your opinion on this?

Not being a parent, its hard for me to walk a day in your shoes and imagine how hard it is. Single parents and young parents dont get enough credit in my opinion. There should definitely be support for those who need to and want to work,  the government spends enough time ridiculing and slating these parents rather than giving them the opportunitys they need and praising the stuff that they do do.

What do you want to be when your older?

Haha wow, when is older? When I was a little girl I wanted to be an actress or a spy, that was always the dream. Then I wanted to help children in Africa, instead I did that in Thailand,  but for a long time now the dream is to be a paramedic.

Where do you want to be in five years?

Graduated again, in paramedic practice,  then hopefully working in that sector.  Its all career focused and driven these days, things like a career,  my own place where I dont fork out so much on renting. These are things I desire now,  surrounded by my family too and their love. Its such a stark difference to what I would have told you a year ago, which would have been to have a baby, maybe two, and to be with my ex having a family etc.

I feel I am holding myself back as I lack confidence what can I do?

Ask yourself why, whats making you feel insecure. Your appearance? People around you? Write it down. Once you find causes think about how you can improve these facts. Surround yourself around those who make you feel good, and tell yourself positive things, its all in your mind. Maybe try some confidence hypnotherapy or books.

Do you think love at first sight exists?

As a romantic yes that we all have a one, a soul mate,  the one who has our heart, as a realist then no, love grows, there is a initial attraction, but its lust.

I feel like im drifting apart from my best friend what can I do?

First off dont panic. Breathe and think logically, are you down anyway? If so sometimes when we are down we overthink all else, we get insecure and worry. Are there reasons why you have a cause for concern,  if so think it through, and then talk to your friend, writing it may be easier and think what you are going to say first,  don't do it when your upset or angry it make come out wrong and make it worse. Remember they are your best friend for a reason and it will sort out if not then they cant of been such a good friend anyway.

I have no idea what I want to do in life, help.

First off listen to Baz Lurghmans sunscreen song. The best people dont know by thirty what they want to do in life, there is no set plan. Don't compare yourself to others. We all have a plan and we are all meant to get to where we are meant to.  Enjoy the ride,

Feel free to ask me anything, you know where I am.

Jade xox

Manning up and moving on

In life people will come into our lives and leave a mark of somesort, these people may be around a long time or just for a small while. Friends. Family. Boyfriends. Girlfriends, or even just flings or acquaintances. Whatever the reason it will affect us or our lives one way or another for the better or the worse.
In our lifetime we will get hurt by someone, by one of those mentioned. People will lie to us. People will reject us and some will break our hearts. We will all have our heart broken atleast once. Some will face heartache more than once. But what is sure for all is that we will all have a broken heart one that will be the all time break. There will always be an absolute heartbreak for us all. It can come at any age and for any reason but what is different about this shattered heart is that it will change you. It will make you strong. You will reach a low to get it all back again and when this terrible heartbreak starts to mend it makes itself ten times harder and foolproof. Afterall it wouldn't take all the time it does to mend if it was just going to make itself back to the weak old model as before.
We need to face the facts of life. Not everyone will like us. Plenty won't love us and some will make us feel like a waste of space. We will all experience rejection of somesort. We will all feel unwanted, and ugly at some stage in our lives. Some will deceive us and stab us in the back. Friends who we never thought would leave will disappear. Relationships will end and people we hold so close we go back to being strangers. We will all feel alone at some point in our lives. There will be struggles a many. This is all on the cards.
So what are we going to do. Cry, cave in, beg the ones that reject us to give us a chance because we will change. Chase those who have walked away from us. Linger around wallowing in self pity. Embark on self destruction. Give up. Hide away. Let our confidence reach rock bottom. Give ourselves to anyone just because we are desperate for love, for attention. Never trust. Never appreciate good?
I dont know about you, but none of that seems attractive to me, nor would I be interested in anyone who let that happen to themselves.
What is the point. Self pity and wallowing would prove them right and proving people wrong is one of lives greats. Who cares. Everything comes down to you. Trust you. Appreciate you. Love you. Dont waste time on anyone who makes you question yourself or who doesnt make you feel good and loved. Lifes short and at the end do you want to have let others have a control over your life and your destiny. Step out your shoes and look in at yourself and your life. Would you be proud of what you do if someone you truly loved was doing the same. Self pity and sadness about other peoples actions onto us will only ever hurt us.
So stop now. Man up. Move on. Get over it. There isn't enough time to dwell on it. Focus on the ones who do love you. You will know who they are trust me. I know that I will be following my own advice in future and giving my time to the ones who I never have to question. No more wasting time. Remember you have to put number one first, you are your greatest critic in life

Jade xox

Positive Mind for a Positive Life?

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

So I have began this post with one of my favorite quotes from Marilyn Monroe. 
Clearly Marilyn was having a good day when she said this, she was known for her crazy and turbulent life, but this blog post isn't about Marilyn, It's about a little thing called POSITIVITY.

There is no point in sugar coating it, Life can be absolute rubbish sometimes, and sometimes we all have days where we feel like nothing is worth it, and that everything bad always happens to us, we are only human, and sometimes things do get to much. Now if we are honest with ourselves, when we feel like It's the end of the world, and that so much bad stuff comes our ways, the likelihood is that it really isn't as bad as we think, and that elsewhere someone truly is suffering and having the worst time ever. We can't be blamed for feeling sorry for ourselves though, and sometimes when something shit happens, we are not going to take on board that someone else is far worse off. BUT....

If we get into a pattern of allowing ourselves to get down about everything, and to be negative about our life's, then this will only ever continue, and nothing will ever seem hopeful or escapable.

Sometimes in life, we get stuck in a rut. Our routine of work, or school or University is mundane, we do the same things everyday, and we often think the same things too. Often these things are negative, we worry about money, relationships and education/work. Eventually these thoughts become normal, we begin to over analyse, over react and over think the negative thoughts and feelings, this will lead to a lack in interest, a lack in motivation and a lack in desire. You could call this a vicious circle. One that keeps going around and leads us nowhere, at the end of the day it's completely pointless. But hey in this state of mind who the hell cares right, because your all down, and your going to write a Facebook status about it, and your going to sit and hide under the covers all day. 

NO!

One thing I have learnt in life is that -
What we think is how we come across, what we feel is what others see us as. If we believe that we are nothing, we will start to come across as nothing. If we think we are worthless, others will view us as disposable also. BUT.. 
If we believe we are strong, we act strong, we think strong. If we think we are worthwhile, good people we will start acting in that way too, and others around us will pick up on this, they will treat us differently, this leads on to a whole path in life, one where you are positive, confident and able to progress in life, able to achieve the dreams you want.

Its all in your head..
Sometimes we just have to not care what everyone thinks, we have to care what we think, what we want and where we are going. Thinking more positive will not only change how you feel about yourself, but how others feel about you too. Your positivity will rub off on others, and this will lead you on journeys you never knew, positivity brings confidence and makes you feel inspired. 

Sometimes you have to reflect and think of everything you do have in life, your good points, and your abilities. USE THEM and appreciate EVERYTHING you have. You have more than you think, you have more than most, and you have a duty to use them, you have a duty to yourself to be the best possible version of yourself. You owe it to you, nobody else.

And remember..
A bad attitude is like a flat tyre you can't go anywhere until you change it ;)

Jade xox

Letter to my sixteen year old self

Dear sixteen year old self.

Hold your head high, your too hard on yourself,  walking around with zero confidence and looking at the ground. Your so young yet you have so much stress on your shoulders and the mind of someone so much older. I know its never been easy, you didnt really have much time to act young and enjoy carefree years, but you need to try. I wish you could see yourself how you truly are. You dont need to lose weight, if only you knew this instead of embarking on self destruction mode. Starvation, purging, neither of these are good. You will look back and see how slim you was, if I could go back then I would remove the negative thoughts, the self hatred and appreciate what was really there.

It makes me sad, remembering the hurt and sadness that came with an eating disorder, one that stayed for years and years to come. 

There were many battles though, some more trivial than others. Enjoy school, think less of what others think. One day very soon School will be a distant memory, ignore what the 'popular' kids think, it wont matter in years to come. You felt like you didnt have the confidence to get where you wanted because you were not one of the cool kids, but you will get to a place in life where those around you don't make you feel small or not good enough. 

Not only will you go on to get a degree but University will bring you best friends for life and experiences that will never leave you. Travel will follow and you will one day be in Asia working in an orphanage in Thailand,  it will then hit you, that you are braver and stronger than you could have ever imagined and this is why at sixteen I wish you could have seen how unbreakable you can be.

One thing I want you to know is never lose hope and never stop being the giving and loving person you are, you may be naive. In your years to follow you are going to lose best friends, boyfriend's and your way, but no matter how many people hurt or wrong you, your goodness is what will serve you. Dont lose yourself, there will be dark times ahead, but you will make it through all of it.

Your heart will get broken twice, you will heal it again. you will hate school, but absolutely love Sixth form and University.  Your best friend now won't be for that much longer, in two years you will have to find a new best friend, but you will end up with four best friends instead. You have the biggest journey ahead of you.

So hold your head high, you have every reason to.

Jade xox

New Year, New Rules?

Oh Hello.. 1st January 2014.

You got here quick. I haven't even thought about New Years Resolutions and have never been one to make them. Like many others I have seen say 'I'm not making resolutions, I don't need too' etc etc, I was the same, I don't smoke, never have. I only drink socially, and I don't really have any bad habits that need fixing, so i never felt the need to make goals, and resolutions to stick by. 2013 happened how it happened, I achieved more in that year than in a lifetime, but they were not resolutions that I had planned.

I am a strong believer in fate and everything happening for a reason, and I believe our course will take us where we are meant to be, and all the bad and good things that happen can't be changed we have to face them.

I have made a bucket list in the past, and I love to cross off things I do achieve along the way. But I AM going to make New Years Resolutions and goals for 2014, just because I CAN.

So here is my version of my New Years Resolutions.


Travel
2013 showed me how much I love to Travel and all the greatness that Travel brings, Travelling healed me, it made me who I am today, you will never understand this until you have traveled, and by traveled I don't mean a holiday to Greece, I mean backpacking, absorbing whatever culture you are in. I went travelling alone, knowing nobody and came back with friends for life. Its about being brave and going it alone. So in 2014, I already have travel plans set up, Interailing in Europe, Visiting the following: Paris, Notre Dame, Belgium, Rome, Berlin, Prague, Budapest, Bulgaria, Croatia, Serbia, Macedonia .

Take Risks
You may never get somewhere, be with someone, or become someone without taking risks. Sometimes things in life can be scary, you may not be brave enough to stand up and do something, to tell someone something, to tell someone how you truly feel, and when you do it may all be too late. In 2014, I vow to say how I feel, to tell people what I think and to do what I want to do. Life's too short to hold back.

Get Over It
In 2014, I will get over it, whatever it may be, whether someone has upset me, whether there has been bad luck, bad news or a bad situation. You cannot dwell on the downsides in life, there will be shit, there will be tough times, but knowing that and being brave for that will make it much easier. So if someone doesn't like me, what I do, or who I am, then that's their problem not mine.

Think Less
Similar to my resolution above, I am going to think less about everything, stress less, and hold faith that things will work out how they are meant to. I have always been a worrier, but that gets you nowhere in life. Embrace the challenges, think less about the consequences, and enjoy the here and the now.

Think More
But at the same time. I will think more about what I want in life, where I want to be, as much as we find our way, we have to put effort into what we want, if we have dreams, we have to be the ones to make that happen, nobody is going to come along in life and do everything for you. You are the creator of your own destiny, and you are the only one that can change your life and make it happen. So think about what you want, what your dreams are, and start paving way for them.

SAVE
One thing i am terrible at is saving. I pay a-lot of bills, rent, car stuff and other annoying things. But I need to save, I am one for big plans, but they won't happen without funds. I will save each week.

Forgive
Forgiving and letting go is a massive thing for me. I have been wronged in the past, but I have forgiven now finally, and I think its such an important thing, so in 2014, if someone hurts me or upsets me, I will forgive and let go, holding onto negativity and dwelling on bad stuff is bad for the soul and will only ever hurt yourself, not the person.

Love
2013, I pledged to stay Single since I came out of a messy long relationship, and I did, and it taught me a-lot about others and myself, in 2014, I will love myself, because loving yourself is the most important thing you can do, I will also be more open to Love itself, and renew my faith in all things lovey dovey, and of course Love - Holding my family and friends close, and appreciating them.

Say Yes More
Taking chances, risks, saying 'Yes' to things you wouldn't normally, trying new things, embracing new people. Saying 'Yes' and being positive may change your life in ways you never knew.

Say No More
I have always been naive, and I am one of these people who would do anything for anyone. In the past I have done things I haven't wanted to do, gone to places I didn't want to go to, Helped people when I really shouldn't have, but all this has made me realize sometimes we need to stand out ground and be true to ourselves, so this year I will not be taking shit, or doing things just to please people. Its about being true to yourself.



So there are my ten resolutions, Let me know yours if you have made any, and have a lovely lazy New Years day!

Jade xox